I am 70 years old this year, and it is estimated that many people of my age are living at home, but I am not so lucky, because I also have a 90-year-old father at home, who is now not able to take care of himself, and has a little dementia, and needs me to take care of and live every day.
I have two older sisters, I am the youngest in the family, the two sisters are not only much older than me, but also their health is not very good, but also rely on their children to take care of, originally the old father was taken care of by the three of us in turn, and my father has been taken care of by me since he was sick.
Since the old father lost the ability to live independently, his "eating, drinking, lazing, sleeping" and other problems, have to rely on my own hands, originally like his situation, should eat more light food and vegetables every day, but he may be decades of living habits, every other day to eat some spicy and stimulating food, if I make light food he will not eat. But as long as he eats spicy and stimulating food, he has to run several times a day to have diarrhea, of course, I also have to clean him, for this matter, I have lost his temper a lot, but he still does his own thing, what else can I do?
The most unbearable thing for me is that sometimes I am eating, and my old father is either pulling or urinating, at this time I need to quickly put down my rice bowl, first clean up his body before saying anything else, and afterwards I just don't have a little desire to eat, originally my body is still healthy, but now I have a body problem.
If you want to ask me what it feels like to have a long-lived old man in my family? I can tell you very responsibly: It is a curse or not a blessing to have a long-lived old man in my family, and I was tortured to the point of misery in my old age!
Aunt Shao/58 years old, her father is 87 years old, because of an accidental fall, she had to stay in bed for nearly 1 year, and long-term bed rest caused rapid failure of various organs. As an only daughter, Aunt Shao needs to invest a lot of time and energy to take on the responsibility of caregiving.
"I thought I could retire with an easier life, square dancing, traveling, going to a senior university, and fulfilling my dreams that I didn't have the means to achieve when I was younger. Aunt Shao said, "But the reality is that I need to go to the old house every day to clock in and go to work, maybe in another ten years, my son will also take care of me like this." ”
Aunt Long / 69 years old
I have been a grandmother for many years, my grandchildren are very well-behaved, and my children are still very filial, and I still have a pension of 3,000 yuan a month, and many people think that my old age is very happy.
But in fact, my old age was miserable, my dad was a long-lived old man, he just turned 98 years old this year, when I didn't retire, my dad was still in good health, at that time I still showed off to others that my father was not sick or painful, and it would not drag me down at all.
I didn't expect that as soon as I retired, my dad fell ill and was paralyzed, originally I thought that I would be able to travel and square dance after retirement, but I didn't expect it to be realized, and I had to take care of this paralyzed old man every day.
After my dad was paralyzed, he had a very big temper and scolded me at every turn, or scolded my grandson and son. Someone has to serve me at any time, if I forget to cook, or if it is a minute slower, my dad will scold me so much that he will cook and feed him, and he will dislike this salty and that light, and ask me to recook it for him, cook it until he is satisfied, sometimes I cook it more than 10 times and he is not satisfied, since serving him I feel physically and mentally exhausted every day, because he is too difficult to serve.
Sometimes I really want to send my dad to a nursing home, but as his daughter, I can't bear it. I used to think that it was a good thing to have a long-lived elderly person in my family, but now it seems that it is not necessarily a good thing, but a bad thing, if it were me, I would definitely not live that long, because I am afraid that I will be tortured like my father at that time, so I would rather die early than live long.
Aunt Peng/69 years old, my dad is 97 years old this year, he has a bad temper and likes to fight, and now he is also old, and his health is also poor, and he often has to go to the hospital for two days to see a doctor, I didn't want to care about him, but I was afraid that others would say that I had no conscience, so I had to take him home to care for the elderly.
After my dad came, he made a lot of trouble in the house every day, and his temper did not change at all, but became bigger, and my husband often quarreled with me because of this incident, and our relationship between husband and wife also weakened a lot.
Originally, I had a pension of 5,000 yuan, but I had to spend it on my dad every month, which caused me to live a tight life every month.
Many times I wanted to send him to a nursing home, but he refused, he had to torture me every day, and every time he didn't care about the big or small, he never went to the toilet, he pulled wherever he went, he really couldn't stand him, every time I had to clean up for a long time, and then my husband couldn't stand it anymore and filed for divorce directly with me.
After the divorce, I was left with my dad, and I felt very wronged and tired living with my dad, and if my dad went on like this, I would leave sooner or later before him, because he was too tormenting, and I couldn't stand him at all, and now I am 69 years old, I don't want to live to be 75 years old, because I don't want to be a long-lived old man that everyone hates, I would rather die early, and I don't want to enter longevity.
Aunt said
Compared with the past, everyone's life is getting better and better, and there are more and more people living longer, although we all hope that the elderly can live a long and healthy life and enjoy the joy of family, but some practical problems are still unavoidable.
Although the words of the above old people are realistic and heart-wrenching, they do say a lot of helplessness of the children in countless long-lived families. It is said that there is an old man in the family, if there is a treasure, but this is all based on the health of the elderly, and the health of the elderly is a great blessing for future generations.
Of course, no matter what, as children, while looking forward to the longevity of the elderly, we should let them exercise more in their daily life and enhance their physical fitness. Health first, then longevity.
Hopefully, we can all become "healthy" long-lived seniors!
We experience the eternity of love